DIVORCING PARENTS—KNOW YOUR OPTIONS!

This probably applies to many different businesses and professions, but for those going through divorce or separation, it is imperative to know your options for services before you spend money needlessly on services that you don’t want and really do not need.  The first thing we think, or hear from others, is that you need a good divorce attorney.  There are cases in which this is true, but there are many services that people are unaware of that a divorcing parent should know about and perhaps consider first before making a decision about who to hire.

Even if a divorcing parent is going to use an attorney, don’t use or pay for more than you need.  There are limited-representation attorneys, who will assist you with the paperwork you need to file your action and guide you through the process.  They typically do not go to court with you or formally represent you, because often that is not necessary.  But they will make sure that you don’t make a mistake and ensure that you do not wander blindly through the process.  Sometimes paralegals can guide parents through the process, as long as they are careful not to give legal advice or cross that line into what would be considered practicing law.

Often, however, people are guided into engaging in assessments or evaluations that are unnecessary and only serve to hike up the cost for the consumer.  Parenting time evaluations, commonly known as custody evaluations, are often requested unnecessarily.  Likewise, financial or property evaluations are often requested, and there is more money spent on the evaluation that what the parties have to share.  Dividing assets is often done by a formula, as with child support and maintenance, and it is as simple as plugging in the numbers.  A meeting with a parenting time or financial expert is a better way to spend your money than to engage in the process of a full evaluation.  The experts in these areas can advise you as to whether or not a full-blown evaluation is needed.  If a parent has mental health issues, alcohol and drug problems, or anger management deficits, then a full evaluation may be appropriate.  But often that is not the case, and a custody evaluation can cost thousands of dollars.

A relatively new role, a divorce coach, is recognized by the American Bar Association and may be the perfect route to go for the average person going through separation or divorce.  A divorce coach can assess what is needed, or not needed, in your situation and guide you accordingly.  The money spent on a divorce coach is well worth the cost if it saves you from spending thousands of dollars on each of the different types of evaluations that may be encouraged or suggested to the divorcing parent.

Parents going through divorce or separation are emotionally vulnerable at this time, and making decisions about major aspects of the divorce process may be overwhelming.  Finding a good, practical professional to assist you through this process may be well worth your time and money.  Consider this resource before you find yourself led down costly and unnecessary paths on the way to finalizing your divorce.

~Dr. Marlene